Father seeks right to cut ties with child he didn't want

The telegraph, UK, By James Langton in Washington U.S.A., 19/03/2006

Seven-month-old Elizabeth Wells has never been held in her father's arms - and if he has his way, she never will be.

In what could be a landmark case in the American legal system, Matt Dubay, a computer programmer, is asking the courts to absolve him of all the responsibilities of fatherhood.

His lawsuit has the backing of the National Centre for Men, a group of activists who claim that equal opportunities have swung too far in favour of women.

They have dubbed the case "Roe vs Wade for Men" after the landmark ruling by the United States Supreme Court in the 1970s, which effectively legalised abortion by ruling that women had the right to determine what happened to their unborn children.

For Mr Dubay, 25, news that he was about to become a father came as an unwelcome shock. It followed a night spent with a student, Lauren Wells, who he claims told him that she was infertile and using contraception.

The apparent contradiction of those remarks did not fully hit Mr Dubay until several weeks later when Miss Wells, 20, announced that she was pregnant.

While the relationship soon foundered, his former girlfriend said she was keeping the child and, when the baby was born last August, she began legal proceedings to ensure that her former lover paid his way in bringing up their daughter.

Faced with a court order for $500 (285) each month in child support, Mr Dubay said that not paying was his constitutional right.

"I don't believe men have any say," he complained last week from his home in Saginaw, Michigan. "Whatever a man has to say is simply ignored."

After learning that she was pregnant, Mr Dubay said he talked to Miss Wells about an abortion or having the baby adopted, but she ruled out both options.

"I painted a very clear picture at that point that I was not ready to be a father," he said. "I was not ready to be a part of the child's life."

Mr Dubay said Miss Wells then told him she would bring up the child on her own. "And that I would help pay for it," he said.

His lawsuit, filed in a federal court, claims that men who face fatherhood without their consent should be able to opt out of their responsibilities.

While it does not seek to force women to have an abortion or give up their babies for adoption, it claims that women have the right to pursue either option if they do not want to bring up a child on their own.

The founder of the National Centre for Men, Mel Feit, said says that as a result of Roe vs Wade, "women now have the freedom and security to enjoy lovemaking without the fear of forced procreation".

But, he said: "Men are routinely forced to give up control, forced to be financially responsible for choices only women are permitted to make, forced to relinquish reproductive choice as the price of intimacy."

He claimed that the lack of male reproductive rights violates the principle of equal protection under the American Constitution. "A man must choose to be a father in the same way that a woman chooses to be a mother," Mr Feit said.

Miss Wells broke her silence yesterday, saying in a statement through her lawyer that "my focus is on providing a nurturing home for our baby".

Saying that she was "disappointed" in her ex-boyfriend's decision, she added: "I believe that life begins at conception and blossoms. I take responsibility for my acts and will do my best as an adult and mother to protect and provide for our daughter."

Mr Dubay has met his daughter just once, when both attended a clinic for blood tests that proved he was her father.

He admitted it was "difficult to look away" when the baby was in the room, but he believes that it would disrupt her life if he assumed any other duties of parenthood.

"I still, to this point, believe that it isn't right to be part of the child's life. An unwilling parent is not good for a child," he said.

Legal experts say that the case is likely to end up in the appeal courts because judges have ruled in the past that the welfare of a child overrules the rights of the father.

Critics of Mr Dubay, however, have branded him a "deadbeat dad", the phrase used in America to describe fathers who try to run away from the financial responsibilities of raising a family.

Copyright of Telegraph Group Limited 2006.